“The entitlement epidemic usually begins with over-parenting – over-indulging, over-protecting, over-pampering, over-praising, and jumping through hoops to meets kids endless demands,” she says. “Today’s generation of parents are overly invested in their child’s happiness, comfort and success.
“Overly involved parents helicopter their kids’ every move and mow down the potential obstacles in their path,” McCready adds. “In our attempt to shelter our kids from adversity, we rob them of the opportunity to make decisions, learn from their mistakes, and develop the resilience needed to thrive through the ups and downs of life. This is all done in the name of love – but too much of a good thing can result in kids who always expect to get what they want when they want it.”
Here are 9 signs your child has entitlement issues:
1. The expect bribes or rewards for good behavior.
2. They rarely lift a finger to help.
3. They are more concerned about themselves than others.
4. They pass blame when things go wrong.
5. They can’t handle disappointment.
6. They need a treat to get through the store.
7. They expect to be rescued from their mistakes.
8. They feel like the rules don’t apply.
9. They constantly want more… and more.
Whatever the depth of your child’s sense of entitlement, it can be lessened.
Good places to start: Restrain your overprotective instincts and stop doing things for your children that they can do themselves. For instance, if you are worried about your child, preteen, or teen riding in the car with a new driver, say no and then stand firm. Sure, your child will be disappointed, but don’t change your position. Children tend to recover fairly quickly from most disappointments.
Ways to discourage entitlement
Set reasonable, age appropriate limits and stick with them
Teach them to be grateful
Let them learn by their mistakes
Teach them humility
Don’t do everything they want or ask
Teach them about working for a goal
Teach them its ok to wait for something. Delayed gratification builds character
Teach them to be other centered
Here is what the Bible says about entitlement:
Think of others: If you’ve gotten anything at all out of following Christ, if his love has made any difference in your life, if being in a community of the Spirit means anything to you, if you have a heart, if you care—then do me a favor: Agree with each other, love each other, be deep-spirited friends. Don’t push your way to the front; don’t sweet-talk your way to the top. Put yourself aside, and help others get ahead. Don’t be obsessed with getting your own advantage. Forget yourselves long enough to lend a helping hand. Phil. 2:3 The Msg.
Fruit of the Spirit: But what happens when we live God’s way? He brings gifts into our lives, much the same way that fruit appears in an orchard—things like affection for others, exuberance about life, serenity. We develop a willingness to stick with things, a sense of compassion in the heart, and a conviction that a basic holiness permeates things and people. We find ourselves involved in loyal commitments, not needing to force our way in life, able to marshal and direct our energies wisely. Gal 5: 22
Reap what you sow:Don’t be misled: No one makes a fool of God. What a person plants, he will harvest. The person who plants selfishness, ignoring the needs of others—ignoring God!—harvests a crop of weeds. All he’ll have to show for his life is weeds! But the one who plants in response to God, letting God’s Spirit do the growth work in him, harvests a crop of real life, eternal life. Gal. 6:7-8
Neither parent shall deny the child reasonable use of the telephone to place and receive calls with the other parent and relatives. Neither parent shall speak or write derogatory remarks about the other parent to the child or engage in abusive, coarse, or foul language, which can be overheard by the child whether or not Continue reading Power Step Parenting: The Children’s Bill of Right→
I wish I had taught my kids the value of scripture when they were growing up. Here is a great article on how to make it fun and meaningful. The list of scriptures is at the bottom of the article. Learning Bible verses can feel daunting. How do you start and what verses should you Continue reading Power Parenting: Help Your Child Memorize Scripture in Fun Ways!→
Christian parents must accept their child’s decisions whether they approve of them or not, the Rev. Billy Graham advises in a message posted on the Billy Graham Evangelistic Association’swebsite Saturday. The renowned 97-year-old preacher was responding to a question posted to BGEA’s “My Answers” which asked how parents should handle their daughter’s marriage when they don’t Continue reading Power Parenting: Christian Parents Must Accept Their Adult Child’s Choices, Even If They Don’t Approve→
Understanding loyalty conflicts and striving to alleviate your child’s excessive loyalty concerns are important to your child’s emotional well-being after divorce. KEEP YOUR CHILD FROM BEING IN AN EMOTIONAL TUG-OF-WAR. Parents implicitly ask their children to “choose” and therefore, put children in a no-win tug-of-war when they badmouth the other parent or household comment or Continue reading Power Step Parenting: Understand Your Child’s Loyalty Conflicts→
Because kids are spending much more time at home than before, there is a much greater opportunity for conflict to arise between siblings. Parents during these times are faced with many new challenges—and sibling conflict is one of them. When it comes to sibling conflict, it’s very common for all of us to focus on Continue reading Power Parenting: Sibling Conflict: Getting at the Roots→
Someone near and dear to my heart is going through a divorce. Her children are experiencing two homes, separate routines, confusion, sadness, and anger. Dreams of an intact family were shattered. Watch the video and learn a great way to help your child cope with grief and loss through a divorce.
Learning to forgive is paramount to having a healthy co-parent relationship. A healthy co-parent relationship is for the benefit of your children and yourself. Tension, animosity, bitterness, and anger impacts the children in many ways. “Recent research, for example, suggests that a healthy stepfamily can help to diminish behavioral problems in children Continue reading Power Step Parenting: Spoiled Leftovers From the Past; Coping with Anger and Bitterness→
All parents want to raise their teens to become responsible adults. Allowing them to own their problems and solutions is the way to do this. Watch the video
“The entitlement epidemic usually begins with over-parenting – over-indulging, over-protecting, over-pampering, over-praising, and jumping through hoops to meets kids endless demands,” she says. “Today’s generation of parents are overly invested in their child’s happiness, comfort and success. “Overly involved parents helicopter their kids’ every move and mow down the potential obstacles in their path,” McCready adds. Continue reading Power Parenting: 9 Signs Your Child Has Entitlement Issues→
This video describes the qualities of unwise or naïve stepparents and contrasts them with skilled step parents. Don’t let lack of knowledge, inexperience or wrong motives result in disaster and heartache for you and your family.
“The entitlement epidemic usually begins with over-parenting – over-indulging, over-protecting, over-pampering, over-praising, and jumping through hoops to meets kids endless demands,” she says. “Today’s generation of parents are overly invested in their child’s happiness, comfort and success.